s. e. x. is b. a. d.

Warning: several of the below links are NSFW.

Ronda Storms is at it again. Spurred on by some outraged citizens of Valrico, Ronda wants to study the effects of adult business on crime, property values, etc. But first a little background:

Eight hundred people recently gathered at a church to garner backing against a rumored bikini bar. Assuming the rumors are true, a couple of businessmen want to lease a building on Hwy 60 to open a bik ini bar. The establishment will hire feature young ladies dan cing on a stage in bik inis. There would be a cover charge, and because there is no nu dity, alco holic drinks will be sold. For further research, I suggest a visit to Moulin Rouge on Hwy 92 at Falkenburg.

To be sure, whenever 800 people show up to express their unease, you have to pay attention. Without question, the government should listen to their concerns, and address specific situations. But because the bikini bar is a rumor, nothing can or should be done until it opens. Once it’s opened, if the rumors are found to be accurate, suggest to the concerned citizens that they should picket the place, perhaps encouraging customers not to frequent the establishment. Other than that, if the business is running a legal operation, nothing more can (or should) be done.

But that doesn’t satisfy Ronda or her compatriots on the religious right. David Caton of Florida Family Association used this opportunity to suggest the county order a study on the effects of adult business. In fact, the conservative activist Caton even has a suggestion of who could conduct this study: Attorney Scott Bergthold. Bergthold is known as an “exterminator” of adult businesses, so you get three guesses as to how the study will end up. The study will clearly state that these places are harming the general populace. It’s clear to me this will be a trumped-up means to a specific end. The study is rumored to cost the county at least $50,000.

Whether you avail yourself of Tampa’s seedier establishments or not, there are a couple things you cannot deny. #1. They have been around a long time. #2. Tampa has somewhat of a national reputation for such things. #3. They are doing one hell of a business, and don’t seem to be on the verge of bankruptcy. I’m sure it was meant as tongue-in-cheek, but Steve Otto has a solid point: More visitors and citizens would pay admission to enter a S ex Museum in Tampa, than a Museum of Art (or History, or Science, etc.).

At any rate, it’s time for leadership in the area to admit that ad ult business is here to stay. I’m not saying the City or County should embrace this faction. Well, maybe I am. If the general populace supports these businesses, then it is obvious there are enough community members who approve of their existence. Just like a bookstore, they contribute taxes and add diversity to the makeup of our community.

Put another way: The 2001 Odyssey may not have helped in our efforts to land three Super Bowls, and I’m fairly certain they were not listed in the bids as an added attraction. But I know the NFL is aware of its presence. And from what I heard, it was very, very busy for weeks leading up to the games. That the NFL chose Tampa to host another Super Bowl tells me it makes no difference.

Regardless of the outcome of this latest kerfluffle, dan cers, ling erie mod els, mas sage par lors, adu lt movies, and biki ni bars are legal entertainment options and well supported by the masses. To waste money on studies and unconstitutional ordinances lacks common sense. Not to mention that we are going to have to pay $110,000 for a study plus an additional $66,500 for BOCC pay increases for a part-time job.

But the squeaky wheel gets the grease. 800 people in Brandon are about 799 more than have gathered to support this (or any) business. On Wednesday, the county commission voted to begin the process of beefing up the adu lt use ordinance.

Therefore, I’m calling you out to choose sides. If you think there’s no place in Hillsborough County for this type of business, by all means, let your commissioners know. But if you do not mind, don’t care, or even prefer to have an adult business nearby, then you need to speak up.

I encourage you to write to Ronda not to waste your money on this nonsense. If you live within her district, make sure you mention that as well. If you’re not in “South County,” send a copy of the email to your representative on the county commission as well as the three district-wide seats. Email Ronda Storms (dist. 4), email Kathy Castor (district 1), email Ken Hagan (dist. 2), email Thomas Scott (dist. 3), email Mark Sharpe (countywide), email Brian Blair (countywide), email Jim Norman (countywide).

And just to clarify my position: I am more outraged by the amount of taxpayer money spent on attempts to legalize moral values than any claims of loss these biased reports make.

Get involved.