no longer friendly
tommyCheck this interesting comment left recently on an old post:
I lived in Tampa / St. Pete FLA for 17 years. The people were friendly, relaxed and laid back. After being gone for 12 years we recently made several trips back to that part of FLA for business and to visit family and were shocked. No one said “thank you”, or had any kind of manners. People were extremely aggressive in traffic… and I live in Atlanta. Overall people came across as rude and there were a lot of unhappy looking people.
Buildings and roads were run-down, and lots of areas seemed sleezy with row after row of small used car lots, bars with dark windows in small strip mails, and adult video rentals and strip clubs all mixed in with regular restaurants and grocery stores. You just wanted to take some soap and water, and some paint and clean the place up and maybe plant a flower or two.
We found when we went into a restaurant or shop they acted like you were inconveniencing them by being there. There was no “Welcome to ___” Or “Come again” Or “Have a nice day.” There was no warmth. At one store we went into when we were friendly with the clerk and said “hello and how you doing?” she got a scared look on her face like she had never heard that before and we were going to rob her.
In all fairness I think the stress of high taxes, over inflated real estate, high cost of insurance and fear of hurricanes has gotten a lot of people stressed in Tampa Bay… or maybe it’s just the heat.
Are you stressed out? Do you treat people this way? Are people treating you this way? What’s the story?
Tags: tampa
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September 1st, 2006 at 11:05 am
I agree that people have gotten ruder, partly at fault is technology. When folks are on their cell phones they are oblivious to others who hold open doors for them, etc. I also find that I rarely ever get the “thank you” wave or acknowledgment anymore when I make an effort of courtesy while driving…makes me want to just cut them off or block them out like everyone else in this town.
I’m not so sure it’s a Tampa thing since most here are from other areas and probably already lacked manners before arriving.
September 1st, 2006 at 11:12 am
i find that many small businesses, and many large, forget to put the customer first. it appears to be all about conveniencing themselves, not the people who actually pay them money for goods and services. how many restaurants are freezing because the waiters and cooks are hot from working? when you ask them to raise the ac, they act like they are being put out. i wouldnt blame just tampa, but floridas overall education level is low, so people in this state are just cimply dumber overall…
September 1st, 2006 at 11:28 am
I never realize it living here - I have never lived anywhere other than the ‘I-4 corridor’, but I always notice how nice and friendly people are when I go out of town, rural or big city it doesn’t seem to matter.
It is sort of a shock to see the politeness, and a rude awakening when I get back home. Nothing quite stings like the slap in the face of a nasty look just for saying ‘hi’.
September 1st, 2006 at 12:18 pm
A recent illustration of the rude factor: I work in a theater, and typically do the pre-show curtain speeches. Part of that speech is to tell people to turn their phones off. Every night, during the last show we just did, I’d ask people to turn their phones off and maybe one or two people would move. Then I’d stress it again, and maybe one or two more people would. Then I’d make a threat that we’d have no problem finding and humiliating anyone during the show if their phone went off and only then would I see everyone take their phones out and turn them off.
So asking nicely barely gets you anything, asking a second time gets a few more and people only really respond to the threat of humiliation? What’s up with that?
September 1st, 2006 at 2:13 pm
ehh, bite me.
September 1st, 2006 at 2:22 pm
Tragically it’s cultural. We dismiss or ignore forces before us that don’t appear able to beat us in some way, financially, politically, or even physically. Since more of us grow up in this take advantage of or be taken advantage of society, it’s not surprising fewer of us are friendly and mannered. And many organizations, in seeking to stay profitable, employ people for the least cost possible - which doesn’t exactly make for a majority of happy self-actualized personalities manning the store.
Plus, I’m not surprised to hear that story about the cell phone bearing audience as it is completely consistent with my thoughts on this. An audience of people brought up to believe “you’re number 1″ in all transactions would quite naturally sneer at a stage hand attempting to direct them about anything. I don’t think we’ve always been this way. If you look at old movies and TV shows from before the 40s, anything anyone in a position of organizational authority was taken very seriously no matter what their status. You have to figure that to some degree that actually reflected real life back then.
September 1st, 2006 at 3:39 pm
David’s pre-show speech always baffles me. I find it shocking people even need to be told to turn their phones off, and the fact that people don’t even do it until his third (or fourth, depending on how the patter goes
) attempt is just…
I don’t get it. I don’t get people here. I don’t get the massive amount of trash and litter. I don’t get my car being broken into at Al Lopez park in the middle of the day. I don’t get the rudeness, I don’t get the lack of neighborly friendliness, I don’t get anything. I don’t get why what kind of car I drive is so important. I don’t get how people in the South pretend to be so much more “pleasant” and “friendly” than the North when my experiences over the past 25 months and one day demonstrate exactly the opposite.
The litter thing really gets me riled up, though.
September 1st, 2006 at 10:57 pm
After just returning from a trip to the Northeast, I was certain I would encounter the rudeness up there. For whatever reason, I had pretty much decided that I would be back in fast lane and it would hectic and rude. NOT hardly. As a matter of fact, I had a great time, very polite people and helpful mind you, and when the plane touched down in Tampa, I thought that wasn’t so bad. When I exited airport and got on the highway, it all came flashing back. Jimmeny Christmas freaking cars flying at all angles, people driving slow in the left lane, people being rude to each other. I confirmed the latter by stopping to get a drink, and I said “Thank You” and the response was “No Prob”.
The South is NOT friendlier in my humble goofy opinion.
September 1st, 2006 at 11:23 pm
“I don’t get how people in the South pretend to be so much more “pleasant†and “friendly—
You do know that ’southern hospitality’ means you get a warning shot right?
September 2nd, 2006 at 5:47 pm
today i was in tim’s favorite park and a little boy fell off his bike right in front of me. his parents were quite a bit a ways so i helped him back on. how many of us do more good deeds than we complain about the crap that other people don’t do for us? just wonderin’.
September 3rd, 2006 at 11:20 am
Not sure I understand…been in Tampa from New York for over 18 years..I have to say I have almost always run into the most courteous, pleasnat people, and when I dont, I never go back to those places. I think its all in you attitude, walk in somewhere with great attitude and I have to say, most of the time it is returned, ANYWHERE in the country…New Yorkers are very “matter of factly” which is what I like, Tampans are pretty much from wverywhere else, so you can get a mish mosh of all kinds. I say have a good attitidu, and 90% of the time, you’ll get one back.
September 3rd, 2006 at 11:31 pm
All I know is, at 1:30am, when I asked the guy downstairs to please turn down his subwoofer, he followed me back upstairs in his underwear ranting and raving the whole time.
And as far as the lack of Southern Hospitality here, it’s because hardly any of these people are Southerners.
And as far as us being “cimply (sic) dumber overall…” well that comment speaks volumes about the mentality of the people currently crowding our teeming shores.