Me and Mark and Lil Sis and Eddie went to Mastry’s on Saturday night for a warm-up before the insane throwdown that was DJ Mega and the Hornet at the Lobby.
Lil Sis and Eddie were staying at Dad’s condo on Davis Island and Dad and Eddie have hit it off extraordinarily well much to the jokingly veiled chagrin of Mark.
Mark’s exact words on the topic were, “Soooo, in with Eddie, out with Mark!”
Dad’s exact words were, “That f*cking clown. I’m gonna have to bury him to keep him away from ya!”
Eddie, meanwhile, had lots to say. Dad appreciates his no-bullsh*t style. Dad gave him all the security codes to the gate and the garage and the sauna. Dad likes his ideas on crabbing. Dad can see he’s a good guy, because he, too, likes the track.
Eddie also had an interesting story to tell about a homeless man, in Naples, who asked him for a dollar. Eddie told him no and got in his Caddy and the homeless guy started punching the glass, so Eddie got out of the Caddy and the homeless guy punched him in the jaw and Eddie left the homeless guy twitching in the street.
He told us this story at Mastry’s during the second round and when he was done, me and Lil Sis went up to the bar to order more. I was waiting for the bartender to come around when this scraggly-haired homeless guy comes up behind Lil Sis.
He had his claw extended at her and he was probably about to touch her hair, because she is startlingly platinum blond and the light at Mastry’s flickered an excellent, sexy pale blue onto her hair, like she was in a video game where she was, like, the leader of a gang of fierce cougar-girl mutants or something.
“Back up,” I said to the homeless guy in very low, dangerous tones.
He froze. Lil Sis, who is icy dope in situations like these, stayed facing me, didn’t move a muscle.
“Back up,” I said again, more slowly.
He shook a little, and he knew not to move any closer, but his claw started to wobble and extend.
“Hey. Back the f*ck up off my little sister now,” I said, and still no raising of the voice, no threatening physical gestures, but Eddie, perhaps still smarting from the touch of the violent homeless, picked up on what was happening, and he was up outta the chair in a minute, followed by Mark.
“Hey, what’s up? Didn’t I tell you to f*ck off before?” he said, much more forcefully than I had spoken. “I’ma do something now. I told you to get away from here.”
The homeless guy stepped off and Eddie lunged at him, “No, f*ck that. I told you -”
I put my hand on his chest and the homeless guy toddled out of Mastry’s and into the street. As it turned out, the bum had already been at the table indicating that Lil Sis was too much of a rapier blade for his taste and she should put on some weight and Eddie didn’t take the slight to his lady love very politely.
At the bar, a man with an eyepatch said to his friend, “Now, that was good. That whole thing. That was why you go out on a Saturday night,” which made me imagine lots of exciting reasons for why he had lost an eye.
At the table, Eddie was a little heated still and started to tell another story about how he had beaten up some other homeless guy.
We have decided that the homeless problem in St. Petersburg is becoming entirely out of control. Part of the problem is that a bunch of idiot liberal ‘Burgers will just stand there and let homeless people ramble on at them and then fumble for money or let themselves get yelled at when they don’t have any. I seriously know girls who are, like, afraid of downtown during certain times now, which is horrendous, because, for Christ’s sake, this is St. Petersburg, not Manhattan.
The truth is vagrants travel to cities where there is a structure to support them. How many homeless people are rolling up on couples on dates in, I don’t know, the downtown of a suburb of Indianapolis? How many girls in their twenties are afraid of walking alone in the well-lit areas of suburban Des Moines?
Vagrancy should not be enabled. When you see a f*cking bum stumbling drunk up on you, slurring about needing gas money or pleading with you that he is a good person, you just gotta ignore him and if he follows you, turn on him and sharply tell him, “F*ck off. Stop following me.”
Real alleviation of the homeless problem requires broad action – cops telling them to move along, shelters to get them off the sidewalks, feeding stations, mental health support, day labor programs. Your five bucks tells the homeless man that he can get by panhandling in St. Petersburg and, frankly, that is not OK with me.
We are thinking about proving this nuisance and need for civil action by making a short film called “Eddie Rolls on the Homeless,” whereby Mark secretly videotapes me and Lil Sis in a variety of situations to see how many homeless people approach us and, then, how many of these situations escalate into harrassment. Then, he’s gonna videotape Eddie in the same scenarios, only Eddie is going to beat up every homeless person who escalates the contact after being told that his panhandling is illegal and annoying.
The potential of social questions of class warfare, violence and self-defense and kindess toward our fellow man in this unmade film are astounding, but, oh, we’re all just animals on the inside, aren’t we?
And Mega and the Hornet threw it down at the Lobby so hard, you, like, want them to get married or something, except that there’d be no one to DJ at the wedding.
Cross-posted at Interbay Superstar
NOTE: This post is a blunt assessment of an ongoing issue in St. Pete and everywhere. Sticks of Fire does not condone violence on any member of our community, but certainly welcomes a discussion of the homeless, which should include the subject of aggressive panhandling.
Rachel*
3 years ago
Dave (#43) – Yes, that’s what I was thinking of.
And, to the general public, don’t bother trying to act like I’m not well read. Ad hominem does not win arguments – I sure do say that a lot. Swift’s a great one to use here, because a lot of people know a lot of the work.
Randy Paul
3 years ago
It’s one thing to be well read, it’s another thing entirely to miss the point and as Dave indicated, you certainly missed the point.
Swift was a satirist; you’re not.
voxpopuli
3 years ago
ad hominem?
That’s a good one.
What’s to attack?
Another person who ain’t got ideer one what an ethic R.
voxpopuli
3 years ago
Amen to BrotherFire.
Dave
3 years ago
Forgive me, but were I to see any connection between Rachel’s writing and Swift’s, I would be suffering from apophenia.
Dave
3 years ago
the 13th juror – Watch the video St. Pete police slash open tents to roust the homeless
Manhattanite
3 years ago
Oh lord. Hey Rach – come up to Manhattan. I’ll show you some aggressive panhandling (like say tonight, when its 14 degrees out). And then your meathead buddy can find out what happens in New York when he tries to beatdown a homeless person.
And while I’m at it, I can introduce you to a few writers groups in Brooklyn where an overwrought writing style that lacks even a shred of self-awareness or irony (and, oh, talent) will fit right in.
Most homeless people, if not all, are in extremely poor physical and mental health, and in desperate need of medical assistance. Your lack of decency and understanding is disturbing. As is the fact that you created your own Wikipedia page (who DOES that???)
supson
3 years ago
this guy above said it all. obviously this suburban girl hasn’t left the confines of her palace for a long time. but in all honesty, i thank her: we all need to know people this f**ked up still live among us.
About Time the Local Media Pointed This Out at Florida Progressive Coalition Blog
3 years ago
[...] Rachel Moran has the less-than-brilliant brainstorm of filming homeless people getting assaulted by her friends. We are thinking about proving this nuisance and need for civil action by making a short film called “Eddie Rolls on the Homeless,†whereby Mark secretly videotapes me and Lil Sis in a variety of situations to see how many homeless people approach us and, then, how many of these situations escalate into harrassment. Then, he’s gonna videotape Eddie in the same scenarios, only Eddie is going to beat up every homeless person who escalates the contact after being told that his panhandling is illegal and annoying. [...]
Sarah
3 years ago
Rachel, you come across as arrogant, self satisfied, self righteous, and downright mean. Was that your intent?
James M
3 years ago
I bet you thought there was no such thing as bad publicity? WRONG.
Contact Sticks of Fire Advertisers On Hate Post at Florida Progressive Coalition Blog
3 years ago
[...] Don’t waste your time contacting the Jobsite Theatre. David Jenkins of Jobsite is a friend and supporter of Rachel. // Used for showing and hiding user information in the comment form function ShowUtils() { document.getElementById(“authorinfo”).style.display = “”; document.getElementById(“showinfo”).style.display = “none”; document.getElementById(“hideinfo”).style.display = “”; } function HideUtils() { document.getElementById(“authorinfo”).style.display = “none”; document.getElementById(“showinfo”).style.display = “”; document.getElementById(“hideinfo”).style.display = “none”; } [...]
Jeff
3 years ago
Just give the poor guy five bucks already. It doesn’t mean a lot to you, but it means a lot to him.
jason
3 years ago
At a certain point this post became a positive thing for me. To see so many folks presenting relatively rational and well worded arguments against the original poster is something I found encouraging. Not only does it indicate the general level of discussion to be found here is typically better that the simple “you suck” back and forth of other forums but it also indicates that the vast majority of our population has no problem identifying right from wrong as the poster herself seems incapable of. Hussey is choosing to complain directly to the SoF advertisers regarding the post which I understand but I think we all should take a second to understand that the general consensus in this post (and on a blog the post includes all comments) is that humans should not be treated in the manner the poster fantasizes about. That the problem of homelessness is larger than any one explanation or solution. We also seem to agree that the poster herself may be a waste of gravity with the moral compass of Anna Nicole Smith at a nursing home.
BrotherFire
3 years ago
An astute observer I shared this with noted that–
“This Eddie sounds like an aggro dick, but she’s right that women shouldn’t have to tolerate being accosted by homeless people just to appear PC. Also, she’s correct in saying that giving them a few bucks is just enabling them and not helping the individual in the long run. “-And she’s right…but….
I don’t think anybody is tolerating being accosted just to appear PC,(Are you?) much less this woman…who with her words–”fuxxing bums” and fantasies of violence…reveals the insular, selfish disdain that results in….well, stagnant wages, increasing disparity between rich and poor, exhorbitant CEO compensation, loss of class mobility, and the crushing of the American Dream …oh..and somebody just murdered couple of these HUMAN BEINGS who are already bad off…
The utterly clueless way she describes it…
“When you see a f*cking bum stumbling drunk up on you, slurring about needing gas money or pleading with you that he is a good person, you just gotta ignore him and if he follows you, turn on him and sharply tell him, “F*ck off. Stop following me.â€
Ignoring people pisses them off, as it would anyone, and might make someone think you just didn’t hear them! A firm NO is all that is required. Or a firm, “Sorry.” Or a firm, “I have nothing for you.” Or anything besides her stupid, stupid, misplaced anger.
She admits we have holes in our mental health system, but doesn’t think that maybe the guys not drunk, but impaired?? Ugh…Oh wait, she tries to pull the “satire” card while maintaining her “aggressive panhandlers deserve aggression” stance…It isn’t satire to satisfy dangerous, ugly conservative prejudices…It would be satire to reveal their prejudices subtly…
So the defense is drivel. Generous liberal hippies are the not the REASON for the homeless, much less the homeless hassling Rachel Moran.
For the record, I NEVER reward beggars…unless they sing, or get to talking intelligently with me or something…
And I’ve worked amidst them quite a bit….
This girl gets hassled because she’s a conspicuous consumer…and then she’s not confident enough to defend her right to the money she has…she just wants to pretend these HUMANS don’t exist and that they are where they are because they are BAD…not because of chance…surely that’s threatening to the fortunate child! (Their CLAWS!)
I have no problem telling anyone they can’t have the money I’ve earned…it’s actually pretty easy…
I started carrying a bus pass and a calling card when I worked at the Residence Inn in Downtown Tampa, only two guys ever took them (in their very human HANDS)…but I got approached dozens of times….and shared cigarettes with more than a few….
My dad was in Vietnam, and there but for the placement of a stray artillery shell or AK round go I.
-BF
tim
3 years ago
“Homeless hassling Rachel Moran”? ludicrous.
It blows my mind how many people here have completely missed the point. *sigh*.
BrotherFire
3 years ago
Tim, what is the point?
Homeless Eater
3 years ago
mmmm… homeless.
David Jenkins
3 years ago
I’ve posted more of my thoughts on this to my blog: http://maladrin.blogspot.com/2007/01/aggressive-panhandling-again.html
I really hope that people can cut through the personal attacks, hyperbole and polarity in order to keep this important discussion going.
Fritz
3 years ago
the riots
I’ve watched this city burn twice
in my lifetime
and the most notable thing
was the arrival of the
politicians in the
aftermath
proclaiming the wrongs of
the system
and demanding new
policies toward and for the
poor.
nothing was corrected last
time.
nothing will be corrected this
time.
the poor will remain poor.
the unemployed will remain
so.
the homeless will remain
homeless
and the politicians,
fat upon the land, will live
very well.
Charles Bukowski
5/5/1992
Gregory
3 years ago
“Did you ever take a grammar class? I know what you meant, but you’re a goddamned illiterate it seems.
Cheers,
Phantom”
You made it that far, Phantom? I couldn’t get past the very first line (“Me and Mark and Lil Sis and Eddie went to Mastry’s on Saturday…”) without going into grammatical convulsions. I must admit though, it set the tone good…I mean well.
Still think beating up the homeless is a cool idea? at Florida Progressive Coalition Blog
3 years ago
[...] Read the Miami Herald article here. [...]
curious
3 years ago
are we still talking about this? how about we check it out from the source:
http://www.wideyedfilms.com
a documentary on the homeless situation in st pete.
Ninj
3 years ago
I love how any human compassion is written off by self-centered jackasses as “PC” or “middle-class guilt” or “white guilt” or “liberal guilt” or whatever.
Isn’t possible, just possible, that you’re wrong? Isn’t possible that it’s not everyone else who has the disorder, but you who are the freak? Your attempts to hide how pathetically sheltered and selfish you are has turned into a form of projection. Stop it.
Ninj
3 years ago
Oh yeah, your wikipedia page…also monumentally pathetic. Seriously kid, get a clue or stop sharing your thoughts.
Amnesiatic
3 years ago
Hey, maybe next time the homeless guy will be your dad:
http://www.cnn.com/2007/US/01/26/amnesia.victim.ap/index.html
I promise I’ll kick his ass good for you if he asks me for help.
bint alshamsa
3 years ago
The inhumanity of idiots like Rachel completely disgusts me. However, it is some consolation to know that karma will deal harshly with those of her ilk.
When I was young, I left Louisiana to study biology at Northwestern University in Evanston, Illinois. It was my first time living away from home. That year, I spent long hours studying at the public library a few blocks away from the dormitory. This meant that I had to walk in the very dark streets of a city where I knew no more than thirty people total.
During that time I met a homeless man who taught me all about what it means to live on your own. He was the first person that made me feel welcome up there. He told me all about what places I just had to visit while I was there and he escorted me to my dorm whenever he saw me coming down the street late at night by myself. I was glad to be able to shoot him a few bucks whenever I had cash on me.
Judging from where I went to school and how I dressed, I’m sure he knew that I wasn’t exactly poor. If he had wanted to, on any given night he could have hit me over the head and robbed me of enough cash to keep him comfortable for a few months or so, at least. Yet, he NEVER did so.
Personally, I’d rather walk down the street with most of the homeless people I’ve encountered than to spend even a moment with shallow, pathetic people like Rachel and her friends.
A. Magnus
3 years ago
According to folks who serve the homeless at the Sophie Sampson center inb downtown St. Pete, about half of the homeless men they serve there are veterans. Now applying that statistic to your boy Eddie’s antics of beating on two homeless men means odds are he’s beaten up a vet. Way to support the troops, *sshole. Who needs hippies spitting on returning troops in airports when they can have yuppies cleaning their clocks as soon as Uncle Sam’s done with them?
anonymous
3 years ago
for what it’s worth, Tommy’s band JGLB gave $500 to Metropolitan Minstries this past Christmas. JGLB also $1,157 to Red Cross immediately after Hurricane Katrina. see http://static.flickr.com/25/41076152_95381fb373.jpg and http://static.flickr.com/33/41076151_92430abdb6.jpg
http://jglb.net/db3/00286/jglb.net/_uimages/metmin6e.Jpg
and http://jglb.net/db3/00286/jglb.net/_uimages/metmin6d.Jpg
http://jglb.blogspot.com/2007/01/what-your-support-of-jglb-means.html
http://jglb.blogspot.com/2005/09/update-9-9-05.html
thanks to Tommy for being a great guy.
Blurbex » Blog Archive » Tim and Rachel gone horribly wrong
3 years ago
[...] her and her sis during a recent soiree out for cocktails. I’ll let you absorb it for yourself here, but suffice it to say the attitude was 1) how grody 2) why can’t the cops do something about [...]
Iz
3 years ago
I have to do a paragraph
Horus
3 years ago
I really can’t stand little snob bitches like this that they should never give a homeless person a damn quarter for a hamburger or something.. it’s too bad they don’t allow us homeless to shoot morons like you.. I for one would love to take up arms against yuppie skum of the earth little rich bitches like this.. they all should get raped in alley ways!! MANSON FAMILY VALUES!
kali
2 years ago
what the heck was he in there for if he were homeless shouldnt he be bying other than the stuff he was bying….