Sticks of Fire: a Tampa blog

What if you held an election, and no one (literally - not one person) cared?

The City of Tamarac (near Fort Lauderdale) wants to annex the adjoining neighborhood of Prospect Bend. The question of annexation was on Tuesday’s ballot for Prospect Benders, and not a single one of them showed up to vote. Check out these tidbits from the article:

on Election Day, poll workers sat in a nearby polling site… for 12 hours — to no avail.

“I’m just shocked that there was an election held and no one showed,” said state Rep. Jack Seiler, D- Wilton Manors…

… registered voter, 23-year-old Juan Vidal: “It doesn’t make any difference to me either way.”

And now some folks want Floridians to vote twice for the same thing?

Good luck with that.

I’ll bet certain special interests were meanly happy to see this headline & subhead in the St. Pete Times, casting aspersions on the Environmental Protection Commission:

Auditor slams watchdog’s recordkeeping

The Environmental Protection Commission is doing a poor job of keeping track of its work.

Like a gossip tabloid making something innocuous sound sensational, the Times makes a bland audit sound as though it revealed shoddy bookkeeping which might be hiding something. They even misquote the auditors:

“It is unclear if they are protecting wetlands because of the incomplete data,” said Chad Lallemand, who helped prepare the report for auditor Jim Barnes.

Both Jim Barnes and Chad Lallemand tell me Lallemand never said this. The auditors have no doubt that EPC does protect wetlands. What is somewhat unclear is the extent to which they protect wetlands, because while much of the protection is documented, some simply cannot be.

As EPC Director Dr. Garrity told me, “It’s like asking the police how much crime they have prevented.”

EPC can and does count the acres of wetlands that have been impacted (legally or illegally), then replaced or mitigated through EPC regulation. But it’s impossible to know exactly how many acres of wetland impacts have been avoided due to EPC.

When a developer brings their plans to EPC for an initial review, who can say how many acres of wetland impacts they have already avoided, knowing that EPC would make them revise their plans had they shown certain impacts? How can EPC count all the acres of wetlands that would have been impacted if developers didn’t have to go through EPC reviews? Maybe some developers would have avoided some wetlands voluntarily, while some would have paved over every inch of wetlands that EPC protects, if they could get away with it.

EPC protects wetlands not only by enforcing regulations, but also by working together with builders, farmers and others in the early planning stages of projects, to help draw up plans that avoid wetland impacts in ways they may not have considered without the expertise of EPC’s engineers and hydrologists. If EPC suggests relocating an access road on an early pencil-draft plan, are they to take credit for saving a wetland that would have been impacted IF that road had finally been built over the wetland where it was first penciled in? Would the auditors then fault them for claiming too much success?

One of the conclusions in the county’s audit of the EPC is the suggestion to develop some performance measures to better account for the wetland impacts that are avoided due to EPC processes. As noted in the auditors’ report, and in Dr. Garrity’s attached response, EPC has recognized this need, and has already begun improving their performance measures.

So the Times turns this into an accusation of incomplete record keeping, and boosts it with a misquote suggesting that EPC may not be protecting wetlands at all.

Last summer, special interests almost succeeded in getting our county commission to eliminate EPC wetland protections. Citizens had to work feverishly to snatch the agency from the flames. Innuendo from the Times serves only to fan those flames which are still licking at our EPC.

Local recipe and food blogger Jaden Hair started her Steamy Kitchen blog in February of 2007. By August, she was getting big-time pub from the Tampa Tribune and the Wall St. Journal. Before that month ended, Jaden was looking for a logo for her brand new column in Creative Loafing.

Alas, it is over. In tomorrow’s weekly, she dumps Creative Loafing for a bigger paper:

There’s no easy way to break up, except to just tell the truth. He’s older, more mature and…sigh…has a bigger masthead. I’d be lying if I told you that size doesn’t matter, because right now at this stage in my life and career, it does.

Today we found Jaden in Jeff Houck’s Flavor section (more to come on this!), announcing her new gig at the Tribune. Who knows what’s next?

Of course, not everybody goes from being an unknown to a superstar, but earlier this year, Jaden gave Creative Loafing readers some helpful hints on how to begin your very own food blog. You can imagine one or more of those readers finding how easy it is to get it going, and just start blogging. And who knows, one day they too may become a media superstar like Jaden.

Creative Loafing might have an opening.

This summer, Red Bull Flugtag will land in Tampa Bay:

On July 19, the outrageous human-powered flying competition known as Red Bull Flugtag will once again soar over the Sunshine State, but this time it will touch down in Tampa Bay’s waters. While Red Bull Flugtag’s 2004 stop in Miami saw its share of empanada gliders, flying toilets and bonsai penguins, it’s up to Tampa Bay to produce a new set of airborne heroes.

Flugtag, which means “flying day” in German, is the only competition where the creative, brave and often slightly crazy get to pilot homemade flying machines off the end of a 22-foot ramp and into the great wide open – or, as is ultimately the case, the great wide waters below. Thirty teams of up to five members each will get the chance to prove their chops, shake their feathers and test their engine-free inventions at The City Park at Tampa Convention Center.

The first Red Bull Flugtag took place in Vienna, Austria, in 1991. Since then, more than 35 Flugtags have been held around the world — from Ireland to San Francisco — attracting up to 300,000 spectators. The record for the farthest flight-to-date currently stands at 195 feet set in 2000 at Flugtag Austria. The U.S. record stands at 155 feet set in Nashville, TN in 2007.

It seems like it is quite the spectacle. Check out the top ten crashes (works best in IE).

OK, so now you gotta get started on your flying machines. Teams are judged on three criteria: distance, creativity and showmanship. What constitutes a craft is purely up to the imagination of the participating teams. Past Red Bull Flugtag entries have included a pregnant cow, a diaper-delivering stork, a pimped-out Cadillac, a giant Oompa Loompa, and yes folks — a lobster named Larry.

A total of up to 5 people can be on a team (4 pushers and 1 pilot). Only the pilot may be in the craft at time of launch and must be 18 years of age or older. Have no fear, those younger may participate as team member! Remember, all crafts must be entirely human powered - no catapults, slingshots, or stored energy. Applications will be judged on criteria similar to event day.

Go fill out an application by the MAY 16 DEADLINE, and bring your craft to Convention Center Park in July.

By the way, if you do enter the contest, contact me. We may want to sponsor an entry in the thing.

I attended the TBARTA Open House on Monday, and today I’m bringing it to you, just in case you didn’t slog through rush-hour traffic to voice your concerns about transportation around here. (Sticks commenter Scott Gunsaullus spent 2 hours on public transportation to get to the meeting!) But you get to skip that transportation hassle, and you don’t have to wade into the usual gaggle of developers, politicians and activists milling about this kind of thing. You can participate in the Open House virtually, right here on Sticks of Fire.

First, check out the maps that were posted around the room, with “general connections” identified. Then fill out the same questionnaire that was handed out, just as if you were there.

Uh-oh. What’s that green swath on the map of South Hillsborough Options? Is that the Green Swath of Death rearing its ugly head again? So soon after it was scraped off our county planning maps by massive citizen opposition? (See my article, “roads to sprawlville” for background on this beltway/bypass.)

I asked a couple of the TBARTA folks about this, but they were kind of vague. “It’s just a possible corridor,” they told me. “We’re asking for input on all the possibilities. Everything is on the table at this point.”

Hmmm. It looks kinda like a rail corridor, but then it hooks up with a new road corridor. Could this be a resurrection of the Brandon Bypass?

I mentioned that Green Swath on my questionnaire. I told ’em that new roads in rural areas attract expensive suburban sprawl, waste farmland under new development, and pour more commuter traffic on all our roads; and, I told ’em, we need to be concentrating our growth and infrastructure along urban transit corridors in order to make mass transit feasible. And I told ’em I don’t like roads carving up my nature preserves.

Certain people — the people who make money this way — are still pushing for new roads to open up cheap farmland for more sprawling subdivisions full of commuters. If you have an opinion on transportation, you might want to voice it soon, because

TBARTA is charged with developing a Regional Transportation Master Plan by July 1, 2009.

TBARTA is also charged with engaging the public in developing this plan, so let them know what you think about rail, buses, roads, alternative transportation — anything that matters to you in your regional transportation plan.

Brendan McLaughlin found that the metro area of Tampa currently holds the title of “worst cheating quotient”.

Uh.. uhmmmm….. uh..

San Diego is almost as bad? And St. Louis too?

I was fully prepared to write a post extolling the virtues of Megacon and listing the one-stop-shopping convention as the best option for nerdy fans of gaming, anime, comics, and sci-fi for another year. The truth is when I got to the con, I realized I enjoyed FX more than I enjoyed Megacon this year.

FX International offered up bigger stars, was less crowded, and had a congenial staff. Katie Jarvinen, the general manager of the con, personally worked with me to get me what I needed, smoothed out issues over the phone and through email, and was always polite and helpful, even when she was busy with keeping celebrities happy at the event’s autograph alley. I felt like a valued guest of the event.

From Megacon, I received one generic email.

While FX was centralized, Megacon was spread out over two floors. And then, there were the scheduling conflicts.

I joined up with One World by Night, a Live Action Roleplay group I’m a member of. In the convention program, the group was scheduled until 1:30 a.m. all three nights of the con. Before midnight on Friday, we had security guards telling us to leave, even after we showed them our scheduled time in the event’s official booklet. Saturday was worse, with a security guard asking if we were in a seance and having a party and then readjusting our lighting to full bright before 11 p.m. Anyone who’s LARPed or table topped before will understand why some angry members who traveled across the country to attend Mega just to game asked for their money back. For everyone else, imagine a security guard turning on the lights during a play or movie and asking the audience why they’re all sitting around.

There were also problems securing passes for game staff and the expected annoyance of paying $6-$10 for a day’s worth of parking. Fortunately, myself and others staying at the Days Inn across the street could walk to the convention center in around 10 minutes. Note to anyone attending a conference or convention at the Orange County Convention Center: the Days Inn is a good choice for a price that shouldn’t eat your wallet.

For me, there were three highlights to the con. There was a miniature game piece painting room, which offered up free classes and free miniatures to paint for different games. I spent at least an hour painting a tiny warrior woman brandishing a pair of swords. There were also a number of people carrying around ball-jointed dolls (china dolls that can be posed and which can cost thousands of dollars when fully painted and accessorized). I even got to hold one, realizing they’re much creepier in person. There were also belly dancing lessons and performances throughout the day. I’m not sure how they fit into the overall theme of the event, but they were fun.

There are more cons coming up this year. Here’s a brief rundown of those closest to us.

Jacon

This is a 24-hour anime con in Orlando. Their guest of honor is Tara Strong and features anime related attractions, from artists to musical guests. They have some guest related info up, but the site’s a little sparse on details.

Oasis 21

Authors and artists will be on hand for the Orlando Area’s Science Fiction Society’s convention. The con runs May 23-25 and has David Gerrold and Paul Vincenti as guests of honor. Their website has a full listing of guests and events.

Metrocon

Tampa’s anime convention is being held July 18-20 at the Tampa Convention Center. Expect a bunch of otaku (hard-core anime fans) in costume. There are also costume contests, a human chess match, a masquerade, and a host of other visual draws. Check out the Metrocon site for more info.

Necronomicon

Necronomicon has had some problems in the past, partly because of rowdy con attendants and overflow from Guavaween. This year, the horror party is going to be at the downtown St. Pete Hilton Oct. 10-12. I’ve always liked Necro for not overlooking literature, as other cons usually do. This year the guests of honor are Frederick Pohl, Julie E. Czerneda, and Rick Wilber (who, for reasons of disclosure, is a former professor of mine.) Necro is another RPG friendly con. Necro’s site has a few tidbits about this year’s events.

Screamfest

Screamfest is another horror fest in October, but this one’s in Orlando. It runs from Oct. 17-19 and has a line up of film festivals and bands as well as stars and writers in attendance. The site doesn’t have much info yet, but if you’re interested bookmark it and check it out in a few months.

FX 2009

Yes, next year’s FX in Orlando is already in the works. The website already has a few juicy tidbits about next year (including info about a poker game where comic book professionals raise money for a good cause) but won’t be up in its full glory for at least a few months.

The Tampa Tribune reports that the developers of Trump Tower Tampa are close to giving up the ghost. One single financing option remains, and if that fails, they are ready to walk away and sell.

You might remember when Donald Trump welcomed everyone to get in on the ground floor of the “tallest building on the Gulf Coast.” Now his name is becoming mud all over America. No matter, the Donald is looking to Puerto Rico.

As far as the downtown spot, mayor Pam Iorio has had her eyes on the riverfront property since July of last year. Look for the city to buy it and add to the Riverwalk.

Hillsborough County Commissioners unanimously agreed to red light cameras on Thursday. The Tribune notes:

… 10 Hillsborough County intersections will get red light cameras that supporters say save lives and detractors claim cause more - not fewer - accidents.

Red light cameras cause about as many crashes as red lights. Neither are the reason for accidents. Selfish, careless, negligent, thoughtless, self-centered, inconsiderate, and inattentive drivers are to blame for wrecks.

Once these cameras are installed, you better look out. RLCs won’t change the habits of these people right away. They will still be driving on your streets while on the phone, applying makeup, reading the newspaper, and texting their peeps. And the odds are they will be right behind you when you slow quickly for a yellow light (which is what you are supposed to do). So there will be a few fender benders.

But not to fear. It costs a lot less to fix the rear of your vehicle than the front of it. And after just a couple of months (and plenty of front-end body work), those selfish drivers will realize that they should maybe pay a bit more attention to the road. All will be well in no time.

We applaud the decision of your Hillsborough County Commissioners.