Sticks of Fire: a Tampa blog

I know the only thing worse than hearing a fan whine about how the officials are cheating against their favorite team is hearing a fan whine about how the officials are cheating against their FIRST PLACE team.

But seeing not one, but two utterly heinous blown calls go against the beloved home town Tampa Bay Rays twice within a week is enough to make one at least react like this:

Granted, Sunday’s game in Chicago probably shouldn’t have even gone to extra innings. However, I fear that Shawn Riggans might be the Rays answer to former Lightning defender Pavel Kubina. He’s a dedicated team guy that you really want to embrace because he works hard and isn’t afraid to do more than his share of dirty work but always seems to do that one dumb thing in a game that makes you react like this:

In this case, it was dropping the ball on as easy and routine a play at home plate as you’re ever likely to see which allowed the tying run to score. Excuse me for a second please…

Of course, that doesn’t excuse the heinousness that followed.

Now, no reasonable person should think that any kind of “fix” is taking place. For one, this isn’t the NBA. Secondly, there are literally millions of reasons to believe that if there was some kind of dark conspiracy taking place behind the scenes to favor one team over another, it probably wouldn’t be for the White Sox:

Third, and most important, we’re still in first place.

Cross posted at Ridiculously inconsistent trickle of consciousness

Oh boy!

In another one of those kooky quirks of scheduling, Tampa played host to both the Women of Faith Infinite Grace conference and the 2008 FetishCon this past weekend. One event featured appearances by Eden Wells, Kumi Monster and RubberDoll, the other featured Patsy Clairmont, Sandi Patty and Marilyn Meberg. I’ll let you Google those names and figure out who was where, but the real delight is in knowing that these people and their fans were both occupying the same relatively small space at the same time.

Event organizers and venue bookers will both say that Tampa is a large enough city now that having multiple events that draw large and disparate crowds at the same time really shouldn’t be an issue. And they’re probably right. But…

Women Of Faith was held at the St. Pete Times Forum, which can hold up to 20,000 people and FetishCon, which draws over 2,000 people, was held at the Hyatt Regency about a half mile away. There are four, maybe five, hotels and about a dozen or so restaurants that you could reasonably classify as within walking distance of those two sites. Factor in just how dissimilar these two groups are and you have a recipe for awkward social interaction comedy gold, baby!

I’m just picturing two groups of people, clutching either bibles or leashes with people attached to them, waiting for the streetcar to Channelside or for a table at First Watch: “Umm…that’s okay, you go ahead. No, really. Please.”

Cross posted at Ridiculous trickle of consciousness

Back in the early ’80s, civic leaders branded Tampa “America’s Next Great City”. Since then, we’ve been on a quest to gather as many sports franchises, high profile events, aquariums and streetcars as possible in an effort to legitimize that claim. Another brick in that wall was added this week when it was announced a big name was coming to Tampa. No, not quarterback Brett Favre who was traded to the New York Jets instead of the beloved hometown Buccaneers, but a much, much bigger fish. Or rather, someone who…allegedly…sends others to sleep with the fishes.

Naturally, we as a community could not possibly be more excited. Well, except maybe for Rays skipper Joe Maddon, who when he first heard Junior was coming to town thought a late waiver wire deal had been worked out to get Ken Griffey. But for the rest of us, while we love justice, we really love spectacle on a grand scale. And this has all the makings of an epic, just the way we like it. Word is that negotiations are already underway for either Joe Redner, Debra LaFave or a couple of Hogans to throw out the ceremonial first affidavit (I’m pulling for Redner; having been arrested over 140 times, the guy really knows his way around a courtroom).

(Cross posted at Ridiculously inconsistent trickle of consciousness)

Kind of on the spur of the moment, I attended the much-hyped Criss Angel event at Clearwater Beach last night. The illusionist was scheduled to “escape” from the condemned Spyglass Inn live before it was imploded on his A&E television show.

I was just excited to see a building imploded, something I’ve always wanted to witness live. Unbelievably, there’s no actual video of it up on YouTube yet (of course, that could change by the time you read this), but here is the computer animation of what was supposed to happen:

It went down just like that and was truly an amazing thing to see happen in person. On that front, the evening did not disappoint. Other aspects, however…

We were really too far away to witness the whole magic, great escape aspect but I recorded the show and watched it this morning and it looked kind of corny on TV. What I find strange…and funny…is how many people seem seriously upset after the fact that there might have been some trickery involved.

I guess it didn’t occur to these people that neither the city of Clearwater nor the company handling the demolition would sign off on a televised stunt where there was real danger. If nothing else, do they really think the guy in charge of pushing the button to set off the explosives is going to do so if it means killing someone?

“Sorry, my orders are to push the button at 10:55 and that’s what I’m-a gonna do. (BOOM!)”

Newsflash: Magicians don’t really have magical powers. There’s a reason these stunts are called “illusions”. Somebody better hide the sharp objects if these people ever hear some of the ugly rumors out there about Santa Claus.

Navigating and exploring Clearwater Beach itself turned out to be the most unpleasant aspect of the whole thing. True, it’s really not the kind of area that’s set up to handle a sudden influx and egress of 50,000 people but surly parking attendants and (some) restaurant and hotel staff who seemed genuinely annoyed by having to deal with extra customers on a Wednesday evening didn’t help matters.

When it was over, there were lots of police officers driving around but they didn’t seem to be doing much to speed the flow of traffic. I left there at 11:45PM and got home (24.2 miles) at 2:20AM, by which time I was wishing that they’d imploded more than the Spyglass.

The Red Bull Flugtag was presented here on Saturday, for the first time in Tampa Bay, and I attended with a group of friends along with another 110,000 people or so. The arrow in the photo indicates roughly where I was. See me? I’m jumping up and down and waving! Hello!

In case you’re not familiar with it, Flugtag, a German term meaning “Flying Day”, consists of teams of people building homemade, human-powered flying machines and piloting them off a 30-foot high deck in hopes of achieving flight. They never do, though.

So it’s basically the Superbowl of putting on ridiculous costumes, building stuff and pushing it off a ledge into water. And yes, this is as funny and entertaining as it sounds. When it comes to free entertainment, it’s hard to beat people falling into water. Include costumes and flying machines that don’t - just adds bonus points.

Tampa is one of three cities to host the event this year, the others being Chicago and Portland, Oregon later this summer. Red Bull has sponsored about 40 of these so far and we (Tampa) set an attendance record, more than doubling the 50,000 that had been projected. I’m not surprised; literally everyone I spoke to for the last two weeks was planning on going. I think event planners were caught off guard:

• It was scheduled to begin at 1:00 and we got there at 11:00 when gates were supposed to open. But it was obvious that a lot of people had gotten in and set up camp much earlier than that, as evidenced by us ending up where we did.
• In spite of previously published warnings about things that wouldn’t be allowed in, there weren’t even cursory bag searches taking place, at least not at the gate where we entered (right outside the convention center).
• Food and beverage locations were few and far between, which was a matter of major concern because with that many people packed in that tightly, smack in the middle of the day, smack in the middle of July (why didn’t they schedule it for later, like around dusk?), remaining hydrated was of vital importance. Just because we were closer to the hospital than the launch pad doesn’t mean I wanted to go there. Eventually, even though we drank plenty of fluids, our group just couldn’t hang so we left around 2:00 and watched the rest of it from The Press Box. We had a good time but it was just too hot and too crowded to be enjoyable after a while.
• A group of people who were probably a little put out would be those presenting and attending METROCON which was taking place simultaneously at the Tampa Convention Center. Some of the more elaborately costumed anime fans might have had legitimate concerns about being mistakenly tossed into the drink by overly lubricated enthusiastic Flugtaggers.
• I don’t think there were nearly enough police officers on hand to handle traffic. We left well before the end and we still wound up stuck in pretty thick traffic on the way out. I can’t even imagine what it was like when the event was over.
• Lastly, I don’t understand why the city didn’t take advantage of the event to publicize the Riverwalk. After all, that’s really where it took place. For all the publicity the event got leading up to the big day, there was never a mention of Mayor Iorio’s legacy project and it’s proximity to the convention center as well as all the exciting cultural/dining/retail shopping opportunities offered in downtown Tampa…or will be some day…hopefully. I don’t know. It just seems like somebody in marketing would have thought of that, that’s all.

Overall, it was fun but there is a lot of room for improvement if/when it comes back.

(Cross posted at Ridiculously inconsistent trickle of consciousness)

It’s June 30th and the Tampa Bay Rays are in first place, starting a three game series tonight against the second place Boston Red Sox, after which they could be anywhere from 3 1/2 games up to 2 1/2 games behind.

The biggest milestones in Rays history are March 9th, 1995 (the day the franchise was awarded) March 31st, 1998 (the first game) and August 7th, 1999 (the night Wade Boggs homered for his 3000th hit), but depending on the outcome, and what happens the rest of the season, the next three days could be somewhere among those momentous occasions.

With so much at stake, now is as good a time as any to assess what your level of support for the beloved home team is:

1) The Die Hard - Goes to games no matter how well or how poorly the team is doing. Knows the team’s winning percentage and batting orders against righthanders and lefties. Owns several jerseys.

2) The Fan - Goes to games frequently, or watches them on tv. Knows what place the team is in. Can name most of the starting line-up. Owns a cap.

3) The Bandwagon Jumper - Is aware of the team’s general level of performance. Goes to games when the team is doing well. Might buy a t-shirt. Often confused with The Frontrunner (see below) but is generally harmless and should actually be welcomed, as in most cases, there just aren’t enough of #1 and #2 to support any professional sports franchise (with the possible exception of some European soccer teams).

4) The Frontrunner - Roots only for teams that are in first place and switches allegiance frequently and easily. Wears several different teams t-shirts at the same time so they can change as the prevailing winds blow. This is the lowest form of parasite in sports (slightly above agents) and should be shunned and avoided at all costs. Where the Bandwagon Jumper says things like “I haven’t been to a game all year but they’re doing pretty well. I think I’ll get tickets this weekend”, the Frontrunner says things like “I haven’t been to a game all year but I’m blowing off work tomorrow to attend the victory parade”. If this is you, we don’t need you.

(Cross posted at Ridiculously inconsistent trickle of consciousness)

Barry Melrose is now officially the head coach of the Tampa Bay Lightning, replacing the recently fired John Tortorella, under whom the Lightning won the Stanley Cup in 2004.

I don’t like it.

Having spent the last 13 years as a TV analyst on ESPN, promoting the mullet as a viable hairstyle and generally not being a hockey coach, in my opinion Melrose is as qualified to lead the Lightning as Willard Scott is to be the director of NOAA.

Of course, I should point out that it might be a good idea to ignore my opinion. After all, I once believed that signing Dave Andreychuk would turn out to be one of the dumbest things the Lightning had ever done.

(Cross posted at Ridiculous trickle of consciousness)

I honestly don’t understand how anybody who lives here can ever be bored unless they’re really going out of their way to make an effort. There is always something going on and whenever you think you’ve done everything there is to do, you’ll come across something new.

For example, this past Saturday night I found myself in an art gallery in downtown St. Pete listening to chamber music. Believe it or not, that’s actually not how I spend every Saturday night.

Studio@620 was hosting a performance of chamber music by the FloriMezzo Music Festival. It was very casual (nobody was wearing a tux) and entertaining. The musicians experimented with the music and bantered with the audience, explaining things and soliciting feedback. The gallery staff was very friendly and accommodating. Not at all the stuffy, intimidating atmosphere that your average ham-and-egger (like me) might expect. In fact, the exhibit on display “Purses and Passions” featured photos of some of the beloved Tampa Bay Derby Darlins!

It was there (Studio@620, not the roller derby) I had the opportunity to speak with Eryn Bauer. She is from Tampa (a 2006 graduate of Chamberlain High School) and is currently a Bassoon Performance Major at the Eastman School of Music in New York. She has soloed with the Tampa Bay Symphony. and is a member of the “Arabesque Winds” woodwind quintet, who recently won the International Chamber Music Ensemble Competition which was held in Carnegie Hall. That means she’s talented and stuff. I asked her a few questions:

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